FB: American Rivers Conference

[sportsknight]

Tom Brands > Tim Tebow > Stan Zwiefel > Chuck Norris

[Walston Hoover]

Stan Z is such a good coach he won the national title with 2-3 record.

[dutchfan1]

I'll bite.... I love Simpson jokes.

Did you hear that the Simpson football team couldn't get into their stadium the other day?
It wasn't locked, someone just painted a goal-line in front of the door.

Where do you go in Indianola in case of a tornado?
Bill Buxton Stadium- They never get a touchdown there.

What do you call an intelligent sports fan in Bill Buxton Stadium?
A visitor.

How can you tell when its homecoming weekend at Simpson?
The cheerleaders have braided their armpit hair.

What does a Simpson girl say after sex?
"Get off me dad, you're crushing my cigarettes."

[sportsknight]

What does a Simpson girl say after sex?
"Get off me dad, you're crushing my cigarettes."

That one's just plain wrong.

[footballdaddy]

Very wrong. But funny.

[Fannosaurus Rex]

It's rivalry week.  If you can't stand the heat...

[footballdaddy]

BTW, is AZDutchman Central's version of ShowMe?

[doolittledog]

BTW, is AZDutchman Central's version of ShowMe?

No one is another schools version of ShowMe

[Thunderbolt]

BTW, is AZDutchman Central's version of ShowMe?

No one is another schools version of ShowMe

But he is in the neighborhood.

[Fannosaurus Rex]

Let's see who can discern the humor in this one.

A high school senior made an over-night campus visit to Simpson.  When he got back home he sent a letter to the admissions office saying no way would he be applying to Simpson and he would just pass along the news that the room he was given had a horrible cock roach infestation.  A week later he got back a letter that said Simpson was dedicated to maintaining all of its facilities to the highest level and that there had never been a cock roach problem at Simpson in the past and there certainly wouldn't be a problem in the future and would the senior please reconsider.  The senior turned over the envelope the letter came in and a little hand written post it note fell out that said, "Send this guy the roach letter."

[Klompen]

BTW, is AZDutchman Central's version of ShowMe?

No one is another schools version of ShowMe

But he is in the neighborhood.

Are you seriously comparing the confidence of a football player's father at the number 8/9th ranked team in the country halfway through the season to an over confident, over zealous football fan of a nearly winless team in the conference over the past decade before the season even begins?

Granted there is a lot of football to be played yet against a lot of teams that beat Central last year, but Doolittle is right, no one compares to ShowMe.

[Fannosaurus Rex]

I am reading a lot on how Central fans shouldn't be talking about, Shhhh, the playoffs (in a low voice).

I hope I don't step over any lines here, but this has always been my way of thinking. Positive thoughts, words are very strong and I don't believe in luck.
I believe the Central Dutch are going to the playoffs! I believe this is a very strong team. I think Central has great players and coaches to make this happen.

What is really wrong with saying that?

Go Dutch!

I don't believe in luck either.  I believe Simpson is entirely capable of winning Saturday especially if Central is distracted thinking about Wartburg or the play-offs and isn't focused 100% on beating the Storm...badly.

[DBQ1965]

Ok, since there is no Dubuque/Loras banter like the Central/Simpson stuff going on.  Though it's really just Central.  Here goes...

Stan Zweifel once won a national title without even being the coach.

Loras sucks because Stan Zweifel says so.

Stan Zweifel flipped the foreign language building upside down, because he is All American and that's how he rolls.

What others call an irresistable force meeting an immovable object, Stan Zweifel commonly refers to as my offense scrimmaging my defense.

Stan Zweifel read War and Peace. He liked the first half.

Stan Zweifel can win a game of chess with a pawn, a paperclip, and the top hat from a Monopoly game.

Stan Zweifel is Chuck Norris's hero.

UD has Tony Danza as an alum...Loras has Greg Gumbel as an alum...advantage Spartan Nation

After Jim Leavitt learned how to coach by having spurrier under him at UD in the early 1980's,  he then went on to become HC at the University of South Florida...and is responsible for driving Bobby Bowden into retirement!!!

Well done!

[footballdaddy]

I am reading a lot on how Central fans shouldn't be talking about, Shhhh, the playoffs (in a low voice).

I hope I don't step over any lines here, but this has always been my way of thinking. Positive thoughts, words are very strong and I don't believe in luck.
I believe the Central Dutch are going to the playoffs! I believe this is a very strong team. I think Central has great players and coaches to make this happen.

What is really wrong with saying that?

Go Dutch!

I don't believe in luck either.  I believe Simpson is entirely capable of winning Saturday especially if Central is distracted thinking about Wartburg or the play-offs and isn't focused 100% on beating the Storm...badly.

Just be prepared to get it back in spades if Central stubs its toe. I'm not saying they will, but this league is too competitive to give anyone extra ammunition.

[Fannosaurus Rex]

And speaking of stubbed toes, does anyone know how badly Aaron Steenhoek is hurt and whether or not he will get to add to his sack count against Simpson?