FB: American Rivers Conference

Started by admin, August 16, 2005, 05:19:42 AM

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dutchfan1

Quote from: Charlie Kohawk on November 07, 2006, 03:52:12 PM
You're killin me Dutchfan1. "How many is a brazilian?" Seriously! Tears in my eyes from laughter.

I aim to please! I'll be here all week, too. :)

Two Simpson College students are walking by a storefront and see a sign that reads:

     Suits $5.00 each
     Shirts $2.00 each
     Trousers $2.50 per pair

One says to the other, "Look! We could buy a whole lot of those, and when we get back to the college, we could make a fortune. Now when we go into the shop, you be quiet, okay. Just let me do the talking."

They go into the store and the Simpson fan says, "I'll take 50 suits at $5.00 each, 100 shirts at $2.00 each, and 50 pairs of trousers at $2.50 each. I'll back up my truck up and ....."

The owner of the shop interrupts him, "You're from Simpson College, aren't you?"

"Well...yes," says the surprised Storm fan. "How did you know that?"

The owner says, "This is a dry cleaners."
A pessimist is a man who feels that all women are bad. An optimist hopes so.

Fannosaurus Rex

I don't get to Pella as often as I would like, but I have never not been able to get into a bar when I needed one.  Of course I am usually out of town before my thirst comes on Sundays.  I probably would need to drink a lot more if I had to spend much time around Simpson.  Pella's windmills and wooden shoes are a little much but I like the tulips and Dutch letters and if it all brings in the tourist bucks, what the heck.  What does Indianola have going for it besides bars and hot air?

The shoes Simpson needs to worry about are the ones that will be running over them on Schipper Field Saturday.  It would be more interesting if Simpson were playing for something other than keeping the not-getting-shut-out streak alive.  But, it will be good if Central gets a chance to try some new plays and give the second string some work.
"It ain't what ya do, it's the way how ya do it.  It ain't what ya eat, it's the way how ya chew it."  Little Richard

sc_stormchaser

Hey Dutchfan1 - those were pretty funny when I heard them the first time during Iowa -Iowa State rivalry week. Most of those were posted on the DM Register website.

redmen

I guess I could go to any generic college joke website and replace "college X" with Simpson College, but I just don't have that kind of time.  For generic jokes, they are pretty good dutchfan.

redmen

Quote from: fannosaurus rex on November 07, 2006, 04:05:37 PM
I don't get to Pella as often as I would like, but I have never not been able to get into a bar when I needed one.  Of course I am usually out of town before my thirst comes on Sundays.  I probably would need to drink a lot more if I had to spend much time around Simpson.  Pella's windmills and wooden shoes are a little much but I like the tulips and Dutch letters and if it all brings in the tourist bucks, what the heck.  What does Indianola have going for it besides bars and hot air?

The shoes Simpson needs to worry about are the ones that will be running over them on Schipper Field Saturday.  It would be more interesting if Simpson were playing for something other than keeping the not-getting-shut-out streak alive.  But, it will be good if Central gets a chance to try some new plays and give the second string some work.


In a college town, having a bar is usually an important thing to offer.  I guess Central students can gather round the windmill on the square instead of heading to a bar on Saturday night.

sc_stormchaser

Simpson - Central scores from the past three years:

2005 - Central won 10 - 7
2004 - Central won 13 - 6
2003 - Simpson won 28 - 21

I would be surprised if Central gets the chance to send in the second-string for mop up time.

dutchfan1

Quote from: sc_stormchaser on November 07, 2006, 04:19:11 PM
Simpson - Central scores from the past three years:

2005 - Central won 10 - 7
2004 - Central won 13 - 6
2003 - Simpson won 28 - 21

I would be surprised if Central gets the chance to send in the second-string for mop up time.

Did you guys find a quarterback yet? ;)

I never had a problem finding ways to quench my thirst when I lived in Pella... it's too bad the Depot isn't still there, though. That was my favorite watering hole.
A pessimist is a man who feels that all women are bad. An optimist hopes so.

dutchfan1

Quote from: sc_stormchaser on November 07, 2006, 04:05:51 PM
Hey Dutchfan1 - those were pretty funny when I heard them the first time during Iowa -Iowa State rivalry week. Most of those were posted on the DM Register website.

OK, OK, I recycled a couple of jokes -- but the Brazillian joke was new. :)
A pessimist is a man who feels that all women are bad. An optimist hopes so.

DutchFan2004

Dutchfan1,


I have not laughed so hard in a long while.  YOU are vicious. 
Play with Passion  Coach Ron Schipper

oldbeake

df1...brutal. :D

You could also always go with the classic news flash:

Indianola, IA - Simpson Storm football practice was delayed nearly two hours today after a player reported finding an unknown white powdery substance on the practice field.

Head Coach Niemann suspended practice while police and federal investigators were called to investigate.

After a complete analysis, FBI forensic experts determined that the white substance unknown to the players was the goal line.

Practice was resumed after special agents decided the team was unlikely to encounter the substance again.

Fannosaurus Rex

You want original?  How about this?
The Pella Police Department needs to be reminded when it is rivalry week.  Otherwise, when the Simpson bus gets to town and the team puts their faces up against the windows, they will get busted for mooning.

Oh man, I have to pace myself.  It is only Tuesday.
"It ain't what ya do, it's the way how ya do it.  It ain't what ya eat, it's the way how ya chew it."  Little Richard

DutchFan2004

Oldbeake,

That is a good one.  YOU too are brutal.  This is going to be a fun week I think.
Play with Passion  Coach Ron Schipper

dutchfan1

Oldbeake -- is Maurer still banned from campus? Let the shenanigans begin....

Let's hear some Beake cheers!
A pessimist is a man who feels that all women are bad. An optimist hopes so.

DutchFan2004

I knew that Simpson and Central were rivals, but as a fan I just didn't know how bad it was.  I have seen the FTD shirts that the Simpson students and fans wear.  I just didn't know how much of a vicious rivalry it was till now.
Play with Passion  Coach Ron Schipper

dutchfan1

#3689
Quote from: DutchFan2004 on November 07, 2006, 05:03:46 PM
I knew that Simpson and Central were rivals, but as a fan I just didn't know how bad it was.  I have seen the FTD shirts that the Simpson students and fans wear.  I just didn't know how much of a vicious rivalry it was till now.

OK, my one comment on the FTD shirts: be original. Simpson stole it from William Penn years ago. (WILLIAM PENN!!) It may have been clever -- 15 years ago. Be original, already. (Not that the recent Dutch rivalry shirts have been much better....)
A pessimist is a man who feels that all women are bad. An optimist hopes so.