FB: Minnesota Intercollegiate Athletic Conference

[piperinsider]

A couple things:

http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1613488/context/popular

A different version of that picture that I like a lot better. Thank you photoshop!
http://www.collegehumor.com/picture:1713411/context/rrated

Go Pipers!

[BDB]

Kilted Rat,

Reply #20950.

Pure art.  8)

[DuffMan]

Good morning.  Tommie suck.

[Kilted Rat]

Tommie Jokes of the Morning

Did you hear about the tragic fire at the UST library where they lost over 500 books?
The real sad part is half of them hadn't even been colored in yet!

What do you get when you cross a UST student and a pig?
Nothing, there are some things a pig just won't do.

Why do the women at UST wear high heels?
To keep their knuckles from dragging on the ground.

Did you hear UST is looking into getting artificial turf?
They're tired of the cheerleaders eating all the grass.

Did you hear UST's Coach Rooney is only going to dress 22 players next week?
The rest will have to dress themselves

How do you get a Tommie girl in your room?
Grease her hips and push like hell

[BDB]

It's another Anna Friday!!   

[sumander]

It's another Anna Friday!!   

Duff, Help the dreaded red x's aren't helping my morning get off to a good start!

[finsleft]

Last summer two young college lads — one from the University of St. Thomas and the other from St. John's — wrangled some good-paying construction jobs.   The Tommy, a strong young man and UST defensive lineman, was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength.  He made a special case of making fun of his Johnny co-worker. 

After several minutes, the Johnny had had enough. "Why don't you put your money where your mouth is," he said. "I will bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that outbuilding that you won't be able to wheel back." 

"You're on, country boy," the Tommy braggart replied. "Let's see what you got." 

Our young Johnny reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles.  Then, nodding to the Tommy, he said, "All right, dumb ass! Get in."   

(reprinted without permission from Wicker's SJU Underground News)

[finsleft]

And another...

There was this recent St. Thomas grad who applied for an entry-level marketing position at a Twin Cities firm.  A new St. John's grad applied for the same job and both applicants, having the same qualifications, were asked to take a test by the manager. Upon completion of the test, both men only missed one of the questions.

The manager went to the Tommie and said, "Thank you for your interest, but we've decided to give the St. John's man the job."

Our Tommie asked, "And why are you giving him the job? We both got nine questions correct. This being St. Paul, and me being a St. Thomas grad, I should get the job!"

The manager said, "We have made our decision not on the correct answers, but rather on the one question that you both missed."

The Tommie then asked, "And just how would one incorrect answer be better than the other?"

The manager replied, "Young man, it's like this: On question #4 the Johnnie put down, 'I don't know.' You put down, 'Neither do I.'"

[sumander]

How do Tommie girls like their eggs in the morning?

Unfertilized!

[57Johnnie]

Good morning.  Tommie suck.

AMEN! 

[knights]

Congratulations to a very deserving UST player

http://www.stthomas.edu/tommies/news.cfm?ArticleID=4513

Sorry I don't have any Johnnie jokes. I will leave all that stuff to you boys.

BTW, I honestly think this game will be closer than most think and I wouldn't be surprised if UST won.  A few things have to break UST's way in order for UST to have a chance, but I just have a feeling that Saturday could be interesting.

[knights]

Pat,

Does d3football plan to have anyone taking pictures at the SJU-UST game for the website?

Thanks.

[DuffMan]

Yes, I was going to mention it last night, but I forgot.  Congrats to P.J. Theisen - Draddy Trophy finalist.  That's two finalists in 2 yeard for the MIAC.  Pretty impressive.

Knights,
From Dumb and Dumber:  "So you're saying there's a chance!"

The Tommies will choke yet again, much to the dismay of the 150 or so purple-clad fans in the stands.  Monkey Stomp by the half - phone it in.

[Kilted Rat]

How do Tommie girls like their eggs in the morning?

Unfertilized!

Is it too early to unleash a barage of Tommie Girl jokes?



I think not!


Happy Friday and +k to all!



What's the first thing a Tommie girl does in the morning?
She walks home.

What's the difference between a pizza and a Tommie girl?
a.  Pizza still looks good in the morning.
b.  Pizza still looks like pizza in the morning.

What's the difference between a Tommie girl and a VW Beetle?
Only 4 Johnnies can be in a VW at one time.

What's the difference between a Tommie girl and a horse?
a.  Most Johnnies have never ridden a horse.
b.  It takes skill to ride a horse
c.  Not everyone can ride a horse
d. Horses are selective about who rides them.

What's a Tommie girl's favorite w(h)ine?
But Daddy, you said I'd get a new beamer this year.

What's a Tommie girl's mating call?
"Oh my God, I'm soooo drunk."

What did the doc say when the Tommie girl asked how long her post-surgery recovery would occur?
Don't worry, you'll be back on your back in no time.

Why do Tommie girls wear panties?
To keep their ankles warm.

Why do Tommie girls like cars with tilt steering?
More head room.

Why do Tommie Girls like cars with sunroofs?
More leg room.

What does a Tommie girl's legs have in common with George Bush and Hillary Clinton?
They're never seen together.

What did the Tommie girl give her boyfriend on their 1 year anniversary?
Crabs.

What's the quickest way for a Tommie Girl to lose 10 lbs?
Hose off her make-up.

What's the difference between a Tommie girl and an Elephant?
40 lbs.
How do you equalize the 2?
Feed the elephant.

What's the difference between the Titanic and a Tommie Girl?
The Titanic only went down once.

What's the difference between a Tommie Girl and a toilet?
After you use a toilet, it doesn't follow you around for 3 days.

How many Tommie girls does it take to change a lightbulb?
1, she holds it up and waits for the world to revolve around her.

What's the difference between a Tommie girl and a bowling ball?
You can't fit a Tommie girl inside a bowling ball.

What does a Tommie girl put behind her ears to make herself more attractive?
Her ankles. 

What's the difference between UST and a Circus?
A circus is a cunning array of stunts.

[Retired Old Rat]

Pat,

Does d3football plan to have anyone taking pictures at the SJU-UST game for the website?

Thanks.

Knights, I'll be there.  I'll be sure to get some pics of #25 in purple.