FB: Minnesota Intercollegiate Athletic Conference

[finsleft]

Investment tips for 2008
For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations in 2008.

1.) Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. Will merge and become:
Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.

2.) PolyGram Records, Warner Bros., and Zest Crackers join forces and become:
Poly, Warner Cracker.

3.) 3M will merge with Goodyear and become:
MMMGood.

4. Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become:
ZipAudiDoDa .

5. FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become:
FedUP.

6. Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will become:
Fairwell Honeychild.

7. Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become:
PouponPants.

8. Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become:
Knott NOW!

And finally ....
9. Victoria 's Secret and Smith &Wesson will merge under the new name:
TittyTittyBang Bang

[stanbob]

from sportspickle.com:
BCS commissioners propose 2-team playoff
Facing mounting pressure to change the current BCS Championship format in college football, the BCS commissioners offered a compromise today, proposing at two-team playoff system that could be implemented as early as next season.
"This isn't the four or eight-team playoff that some people want," said Ohio State president Gordon Gee. "But it is a fair compromise. We're going to put the two teams in a bracket. A friggin' bracket, people – okay? Isn't that what everyone wants? Now please stop complaining."
The new BCS Tournament will choose the tournament participants with a selection committee in order to be even more like the popular basketball NCAA Tournament model.
"It will be just like the NCAA  Tournament committee," said Gee, "only the final decision will be made by the BCS computer. Again, a very fair compromise on our part."

As long as the Buckwheats continue to choke in the "title" game, I think Gee should be seen and not heard from.

The trophy they present to the winner is aptly shaped:
http://www.totk.com/article.asp?articleid=89703

from sportspickle.com:
BCS commissioners propose 2-team playoff
Facing mounting pressure to change the current BCS Championship format in college football, the BCS commissioners offered a compromise today, proposing at two-team playoff system that could be implemented as early as next season.
“This isn’t the four or eight-team playoff that some people want,” said Ohio State president Gordon Gee. “But it is a fair compromise. We’re going to put the two teams in a bracket. A friggin’ bracket, people – okay? Isn’t that what everyone wants? Now please stop complaining.”
The new BCS Tournament will choose the tournament participants with a selection committee in order to be even more like the popular basketball NCAA Tournament model.
“It will be just like the NCAA  Tournament committee,” said Gee, “only the final decision will be made by the BCS computer. Again, a very fair compromise on our part.”

As long as the Buckwheats continue to choke in the "title" game, I think Gee should be seen and not heard from.

The trophy they present to the winner is aptly shaped:
http://www.totk.com/article.asp?articleid=89703

pssst, maniac it is sarcasm.

[The White Silly]

Good bar

[snoop dawg]

fins....that is hilarious +k for you.  Talk about the random simtter....I get hit 5-10 times a day.

[Mr. Ypsi]

fins....that is hilarious +k for you.  Talk about the random simtter....I get hit 5-10 times a day.

Since no one can applaud or smite more than once every 24 hours, you must have pissed off a LOT of people!

[I am not among them.]

[tmerton]

fins....that is hilarious +k for you.  Talk about the random simtter....I get hit 5-10 times a day.

If you got hit that often you'd be behind (ahead of) TDT.

[Klopenhiemer]

fins....that is hilarious +k for you.  Talk about the random simtter....I get hit 5-10 times a day.

Since no one can applaud or smite more than once every 24 hours, you must have pissed off a LOT of people!

[I am not among them.]

I have been loosing karma at an alarming rate lately.  I guess the Karma troll must be crusing the boards late at night, or it is the WIAC boys. 

[SUMMIT!!!!!]

In news totally unrelated to the MIAC, my heart goes out to the family and people of Bathhurst, New Brunswick

http://cbs.sportsline.com/general/story/10573129

As our MIAC teams travel the area this winter, let's hope angels keep their eyes on their busses and vans.

[Klopenhiemer]

In news totally unrelated to the MIAC, my heart goes out to the family and people of Bathhurst, New Brunswick

http://cbs.sportsline.com/general/story/10573129

As our MIAC teams travel the area this winter, let's hope angels keep their eyes on their busses and vans.

That is a terrible tragedy.  My thoughts and prayers are with the familes of those touched by this accident. 

[kubiack78]

hey everyone. Back in the states for a few weeks.  Lovin the cold weather.
I'm trying to load a video on youtube.  It's an old highlight tape for UWW from 1992.  Just had it transfered from VHS to DVD and loaded it on my computer.  wanted to throw it out there.  Rare first year footage of Spencer Johnson at UWW   Any help.  I have a account with you tube  but it is telling me that it is too big??  It's only 8 min long



It was suggested on the WIAC board that I ask Duff for his help in this matter.

Any suggestions oh computer guru

[OzJohnnie]

Is this beaver joke week?  I think the mayor nominated it as such.

Let me tell you, it's difficult to find a beaver joke that I feel comfortable posting here.

[57Johnnie]

Is this beaver joke week?  I think the mayor nominated it as such.

Let me tell you, it's difficult to find a beaver joke that I feel comfortable posting here.

Here is one that can be posted but it isn't very good.
You can keep Beavers out of your yard by putting up goalposts. 

[finsleft]

Is this beaver joke week?  I think the mayor nominated it as such.

Let me tell you, it's difficult to find a beaver joke that I feel comfortable posting here.

Indeed it is. Here's one:

There are two beavers and they both walk into their house. One leaves the door open and the other one says, "Shut the dam door!"

Welcome home Kubby!

[sjusection105]

Is this beaver joke week?  I think the mayor nominated it as such.

In honor of MIACPP Beaver Joke Week I would like to share the following oldie, but goodie. Of course the names have been changed to increase dramatic effect as well as to increase the reading enjoyment of MIACPP readers.

The year is 2035 and Fins has long since retired from the legal profession. In his final case he successfully defended his client, Duffman, from a Tommie who had claimed patent infringement from Duffman on a medical delivery device. Fins demonstrated that the Tommie could neither read nor write and had no concept of original thought. The fact that the plaintiff is a Tommie was the most convincing argument that Fins had in his bag of tricks that day. Upon Fins' advice Duffman countersued the Tommie for defamation of charter and the jury found favor in Fins' arguments and awarded Duffman the sum of 1 quadrillion dollars, of which Fins received 1/3 plus expenses and a case of Hamm's beer.

The last couple of years Fins has been in declining health, but with the fortune he had amassed over the years in his legal practice he is able to afford to have qualified private healthcare workers in his home(s) to wipe the drool from his chin and to change his adult diapers. Most of Fins' days are spent wandering the grounds of his wooded estate in Collegeville Township. Fins, of course, winters in the Virgin Islands listening to Jimmy Buffet music and drinking Margaritas on his estate that overlooks the turquoise blue waters of the Caribbean.

A couple of years back young Dr. KR and Mrs. KR and all the little KRs had moved back to central Minnesota after Dr. KR had served his country as Surgeon General at the request of three U.S. presidents. Dr. KR has a thriving medical practice in St. Cloud as well as being the celebrity endorser for Medical Alert. Life is fantastic for Dr. KR and his picturesque family.

One fine June afternoon Dr. KR had traveled to Fins' Collegeville estate to perform an annual physical examination on Fins and to verify that the fistful of medications that Fins requires each day are properly medicating his maladies as well as keeping Dusty SJU in the lifestyle he has now become accustomed to.

Dr. KR: Hello Fins, how have you been feeling?

Fins: I'm great doc! I have some fantastic news for you.

Dr. KR: What is your news Fins?

Fins: I just got married to a beautiful 25-year-old woman. The sex is fantastic and she is pregnant with my child! Life couldn't be any better.

Dr. KR:  I see.

Fins: I am so excited; I can't wait to have this baby. I was concerned and a bit intimidated on our wedding night, but my fears have been put to rest. I was concerned that the plumbing wouldn't work after being neglected for so many years, but I guess I proved that theory wrong!

Dr. KR:  Fins, let me tell you a story of another patient of mine. He is about your age and he loves to hunt and fish, much like yourself.

Fins: Great, I love fishing stories!

Dr. KR: This is a hunting story.

Fins: I love hunting stories too!

Dr. KR: Here's the story, after I tell the story let me know if it makes sense to you.

Fins: O.K. doc, let'er rip!

Dr. KR:  My patient went out hunting one day and realized when he arrived in the woods, that he didn't have a gun. Not to be discouraged he continued with his hunt. You see my patient was hunting for beaver. He wanted to have a beaver hat made out of the hide of a beaver. He had plenty of beaver hats when he was younger as well as a beaver coat that he had for many years. He knew that beaver was very soft and felt so good when he slipped into it. Then he came to an area in the woods where he knew there were likely to be beaver. He saw a big juicy beaver on top of a dam in the river that all the beaver had built. Realizing that he had no gun to shoot the beaver, he held his arms in the position as if he was holding his prized Winchester rifle. He took aim at the big juicy beaver. He imagined how soft and warm the beaver was going to feel when he was wearing it and how happy the beaver would make him. With that, he shouted BANG BANG and the beaver fell over dead. He retrieved the beaver and brought it to the furrier to have the hide processed and to make it into a beaver skin hat. He was so excited to put on the beaver skin hat, the fact that he had no gun on that historic day didn't seem to matter because he was so happy and proud to once again be wearing that soft warm beaver hat. Well Fins, that's the story, what do you think?

Fins: That story is unbelievable.

Dr. KR: What do you mean?

Fins: Well, I've been on enough hunting trips in my day to know that you aren't going to get any beaver if you don't have a functioning gun.

Dr. KR: Then Fins, how do you think the beaver fell over dead if my patient didn't have a gun that worked?

Fins: Well, I think there must have been someone else in the woods that day, someone who also hunting for beaver. I think someone else pumped a couple of rounds into that big juicy beaver and that's how the beaver dropped over dead, not just from the old guy shouting BANG BANG.

Dr. KR:  That's my point exactly! 

[Kilted Rat]

Wow!    2035 sounds like a great year! If at age 53 I still have little KR's we're gonna have some issues! I hope to be done and snipped by age 35!

Great classic Beaver joke none the less. 


Here are a few of my favorites:


What did the beaver say when he walked into a wall?
Dam

Confuscious say: Man who buy drowned furry rodent must pay for wet beaver.




Little TDT is staying at his Grandma's house while his mom is on vacation. Since he is only 3, and she has no bath-tub at her house, she takes him in the shower with her.

Little TDT discovers Grandma's private area and asks, "Grandma, what's that?"

Trying to brush aside the topic, she replies, "Well, that's my beaver."

Little TDT thinks for a while then asks, "Is your beaver dead?"

"No, why do you think my beaver is dead?"

"Cuz his tongue is hanging out!"



What's black and blue and goes tha-dump, tha-dump, tha-dump?
A Beaver in a dryer.