FB: Minnesota Intercollegiate Athletic Conference

[Knightstalker]

Or maybe some SRV!

Or a Little Sister music!


A good ol' Dallas boy!   

+K to Ralph for a little Stevie Ray on a Presidents Day Monday when the cheap Bastages I work for decided to make us all come in.

[finsleft]

About time for an eelpout hangover report from JohnnieRed, isn't it? Did you go on any auger rides this year?

[Kilted Rat]

Apparently Bill Bellichek just discovered that the Super Bowl was really the wrong tape and that the Pats actually won!

[57Johnnie]

At the rate we are going, we won't break 42,000 before kickoff - unless TDT comes out of hibernation early. 

[finsleft]

Juan comes up to the Mexican border on his bicycle. He's got two large bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, "What''s in the bags?"
"Sand," answered Juan.

The guard says, "We'll just see about that get off the bike." The guard takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand.

He detains Juan overnight and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags. The guard releases Juan, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the man''s shoulders, and lets him cross the border.

A week later, the same thing happens. The guard asks, "What have you got?"
"Sand," says Juan.

The guard does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand.

He gives the sand back to Juan, and Juan crosses the border on his bicycle.This sequence of events is repeated every day for three years. Finally, Juan doesn't show up one day and the guard meets him in a Cantina in Mexico.

"Hey, Buddy," says the guard, "I know you are smuggling something. It's driving me crazy. It's all I think about..... I can't sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?"

Juan sips his beer and says,
"Bicycles."

[OzJohnnie]

A Benny Goodman chuckler:

Getting on a plane I told the ticket lady, "Send one of my bags to New York, send one to Los Angeles, and send one to Miami." She said, "We can't do that!" I told her, "You did it last week."

And one from Benny to KR:

A doctor gave a man six months to live. The man couldn't pay his bill, so he gave him another six months.

[janesvilleflash]

Benny Goodman? The band leader?

[OzJohnnie]

Benny Goodman? The band leader?

Ha!  Can I take karma off myself for being a dipsh*t?

[57Johnnie]

Benny Goodman? The band leader?

Ha!  Can I take karma off myself for being a dipsh*t?

+k - even dipsh*ts need love. 8)

[finsleft]

Another classic from "Benny":

I just got back from a pleasure trip...I drove my mother-in-law to the airport.


rig-a-da-boom

[OleFan]

Lena asked Ole why he did not buy Lena's mom a birthday present.  Ole responded, "She did not use the grave site that I bought last year for her birthday."

My favorite though

A man starts making love to his wife for their 20th wedding anniversary.  He begins to cry.  His wife so struck by the emotion of her husband asks, "Why are you crying?"

Her husband asks "Do you remember when your dad walked in on us with the shotgun and told me to marry you or go to jail?"

The wife says, "Yes, of course I do honey."

The man says, "Well, I just realized that today is the day that I would have gotten out of jail!"

[OzJohnnie]

FYI - The jokes are from Henny Youngman.  Whatever.

[Johnnie Red]

Finsleft, the EelPout Festival was great. Weather was perfect on Saturday on Leech Lake. As might be expected, there was an icehouse that was promoting "Toys for T-ts" with the guys holding cardboard pictures of hot models with a portion of their upper body carved out so any gals interested in exposing themselves would have a place to do so. A few icehouses away they were offering free breast exams. For some reason I did not see KR in attendance assisting in the exams. For the first time in my life I ate some eelpout. Not too bad. Next year will be the 30th anniversary of the EelPout Festival, so keep it in mind.

Next social event to put on your calendars for those of you who love rural Minnesota: St. Patrick's Day celebration in Belle Plaine on Saturday, March 15.

[BDB]

Another classic from "Benny":

I just got back from a pleasure trip...I drove my mother-in-law to the airport.


rig-a-da-boom

Benny Goodman, Henny Youngman, Benny Parsons, Penny Marshall, Henny Penny, and our beloved bennie. It's all good.  8)

[57Johnnie]

Another classic from "Benny":

I just got back from a pleasure trip...I drove my mother-in-law to the airport.


rig-a-da-boom

Benny Goodman, Henny Youngman, Benny Parsons, Penny Marshall, Henny Penny, and our beloved bennie. It's all good.  8)

+ Jack Benny & RHB  - you bet all good
I still want to know that if you have 'Wacky Wednesday'
why not 'Fish Pizza Friday'?