FB: Minnesota Intercollegiate Athletic Conference

[faunch]

A  Tommie Co-Ed stumbles into O'Gara's and orders three whiskeys. The bartender asks: "Would it be better for if I put all three shots in one glass?"

The Tommie Co-Ed replies: "No! I have two sisters at home in Edina, so every time I come into a bar, I order a shot for them both."

The following week, the Tommie Co-Ed orders just two whiskeys.

The bartender asks: "Did something happen one of your sisters?" "Oh no," replies the Tommie Co-Ed. "I just decided to quit drinking!"

O'Gara's is closed now...so you might need to adjust that joke for a year or two until they reopen.

[jamtod]

A  Tommie Co-Ed stumbles into O'Gara's and orders three whiskeys. The bartender asks: "Would it be better for if I put all three shots in one glass?"

The Tommie Co-Ed replies: "No! I have two sisters at home in Edina, so every time I come into a bar, I order a shot for them both."

The following week, the Tommie Co-Ed orders just two whiskeys.

The bartender asks: "Did something happen one of your sisters?" "Oh no," replies the Tommie Co-Ed. "I just decided to quit drinking!"

O'Gara's is closed now...so you might need to adjust that joke for a year or two until they reopen.

It seems appropriate for a Johnnie attempt at a joke. Always stuck in the past. Normally it's more than a few years though.

[jamtod]

How many Johns does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. Hopefully electricity will come to Collegeville in the next few years.

[MUC57]

jamtoTommie, Duffman, et al

You guys are something else. Makes me almost wish I were a Johnnie or a Tommie. Almost!
Hey! How about a Johnmmie? Or a Tomnnie? I' m really grasping at straws, I know!. Go get 'em! 😀🏈

[jamtod]

A scrawny man at a bar in St Cloud says to the guy sitting next to him, "Hey, you want to hear a really funny St John's joke?" The guy replies, "Hey buddy. See the bartender? He played at St John's. See those two huge guys to your left? They played at St John's. See that group of big guys over at that table? All St John's football players. Look at me. I'm 6'4, 235 and played at St John's. Now are you sure you want to tell me your joke?"

The scrawny man says, "Nah. I don't want to have to explain and repeat it 5 times."

Edited to change Collegeville to St Cloud since Collegeville itself is the real joke.

[sjusection105]

What's every Tommie Co-Ed's dream in life?

To be like Vanna White and actually learn the alphabet.

[jamtod]

How can you tell if a St John's football player is dating a Bennie?

Tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck.

[MiacMan]

How can you tell if a St John's football player is dating a Bennie?

Tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck.

+k Jamto! 

[sjusection105]

Why did the Tommie Co-Ed bring a ladder to The Groveland Tap?
She heard drinks were on the house!

[jamtod]

How do you know the toothbrush was invented in Collegeville?
If it had come from anywhere else it would be called a teethbrush.

Why can't they have a nativity scene at St John's?
They can't find three wise men.

[sjusection105]

Why did the Tommie Co-Ed put lipstick on her forehead?

She was desperately trying to make up her mind.

[bleedpurple]

What brings out more nonsense from both sides than a Supreme Court nomination?

Tommie/Johnnie week.

On second thought.... proceed! 

[jamtod]

What brings out more nonsense from both sides than a Supreme Court nomination?

Tommie/Johnnie week.

On second thought.... proceed! 

The only thing worse than Tommie/Johnnie week is when the Tommies and Johnnies team up to attack the Mounties or the Whities. Careful what you wish for. 

[jamtod]

How did the Johnnie football player die from drinking milk?

The cow fell on him.

[MUC57]

I know I posted before but damn, you guys are ruthless. What a great rivalry. Any chance both teams and fans could come to Alliance? We could destroy this town. This could be a party like the world has never seen. You are both, my kind of people. I'll drink to both teams. Actually, I would drink to just about anything. I know, I know, I'm old.........! Well, look below. Go Whoever! 🍺🍺🏈
Should that be "Go WHOMEVER? Whatever, who cares! 😃🏈🍺🍺