FB: Minnesota Intercollegiate Athletic Conference

[finsleft]

A koala is sitting up a gumtree smoking a joint when a little lizard walks past... looks up, and says
"Hey Koala ! What are you doing?"
The koala says: "Smoking a joint, come up and have some."
So the little lizard climbs up and sits next to the koala and they have a few joints. After a while the little lizard says his mouth is 'dry' and he's going to get a drink from the river.
But the little lizard is so stoned that he leans too far over and falls into the river.
A crocodile sees this and swims over to the little lizard and helps him to the side, then asks the little lizard: "What's the matter with you?"
The little lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting smoking a joint with the koala in the tree, got too stoned and then fell into the river while taking a drink.
The crocodile says he has to check this out and walks into the rain forest, finds the tree where the koala is sitting finishing a joint, and he looks up and says "Hey you!"
So the koala looks down at him and says:
Dude.......how much water did you drink?!!"

[Buckman]

At least we've got Santana.  Unfortunately for him, if he makes one mistake, he loses.  How must he feel, going out there, throwing an absolute gem, makes one mistake and loses while the other stiffs can't go out there with a seven run lead in the first inning and hold it.

[finsleft]

Jeepers, it's slow here today.
I suppose everyone's mourning the MSHSL's action eliminating fall dance as a sport.

[frankrickard]

Well, according to Willy dance isn't a sport anyways.

[tmerton]

Jeepers, it's slow here today.
I suppose everyone's mourning the MSHSL's action eliminating fall dance as a sport.

I made my karma rounds quietly this morning as there's no joy in Mudville.  Still recovering from drowning my sorrows over #2 son's season ending loss in spring football (lacrosse).  They had the #1 seed down 8-7 in the 4th quarter when they appeared to score the clincher.  The ref signaled goal but the 3 blind mice then reversed themselves and took the goal away after concluding that they had given a misleading possession signal.  No one had ever seen a goal reversed like that.  Suddenly buoyed, the other team scored two quick goals to win.

For all you baseball fans, lacrosse is starting to kill baseball at the youth level out here.  Our area used to have 8 junior level bb teams; now it's down to 3.  Meanwhile youth lacrosse is booming and the high schools are all putting in turf fields, like the one at SJU, which allows year round use, including lacrosse.  Sign of the times: #2 son's Little League coach now has all 3 of his kids playing lacrosse rather than baseball.  Long term result: look for even more foreign players in MLB.

[finsleft]

This is so touching, I just had to share it with you all...

Subject: Fw: Marital Bliss (what marriage is about)

He ordered one hamburger, one order of Frenchfries and one drink. The old man unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half.
He placed one half in front of his wife.
He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife.
He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them. As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people around them kept looking over and whispering.
You could tell they were thinking, "That poor old couple - all they can afford is one meal for the two of them."
As the man began to eat his fries a young man came to the table. He politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple. The old man said they were just fine - They were used to sharing everything.
The surrounding people noticed the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite. She sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink.
Again the young man came over and begged them to let him buy another meal for them. This time the old woman said "No, thank you, we are used to sharing everything."
As the old man finished and was wiping his face neatly with the napkin, the young man again came over to the little old lady who had yet to eat a single bite of food and asked "What is it you are waiting for?"
She answered


"THE TEETH."

[finsleft]

[For all you baseball fans, lacrosse is starting to kill baseball at the youth level out here.  Our area used to have 8 junior level bb teams; now it's down to 3.  Meanwhile youth lacrosse is booming and the high schools are all putting in turf fields, like the one at SJU, which allows year round use, including lacrosse.  Sign of the times: #2 son's Little League coach now has all 3 of his kids playing lacrosse rather than baseball.  Long term result: look for even more foreign players in MLB.

Too bad about the tough loss, Tmerton.
Lax is booming here, too. At the same meeting that the MSHSL cut "fall dance" (Wonka's favorite) as a sport, they added boys lacrosse. All 3 of my boys have played organized lacrosse. Slightly more fun to watch than soccer, but I'd still rather watch baseball.

[tmerton]

Slightly more fun to watch than soccer, but I'd still rather watch baseball.

Baseball - the drinking man's sport.  You only have to watch a few seconds every minute to catch all the action.  Hell, you can play it while holding a can.

Little League baseball has to be the slowest most painful experience in parenting.  It wasn't too bad when we lived in the LA area since the parents used it as an excuse to hold a cocktail party but the drinking rules up here have been stricter.  Only the coaches and kids drink.

I like college baseball well enough - more scoring though you have to put up with the sound of metal bats.  As for MLB, I'm a World Series level fan (i.e., I start to get interested about the time the WS rolls around).  By then, though, it's the middle of football season.

[finsleft]

Slightly more fun to watch than soccer, but I'd still rather watch baseball.

Baseball - the drinking man's sport.  You only have to watch a few seconds every minute to catch all the action.  Hell, you can play it while holding a can.

You say that like it's a bad thing.

Best quotes from on-line readers to the Daily Planet's report on "Fall Dance":
"Lacrosse is for wanna-be hockey players who were too lazy or unskilled to learn to skate."
"When the football team runs plays at half-time of the dance competition, then dance will be a sport."

[finsleft]

Wow, did I just blow it! I was going to do something momentous and special for my 1,000th post and I just pissed it away on fall dance and lacrosse.
Have a great weekend everybody. I'm going out in search of a Hamm's Golden Draft. And an Old Johnnie Ale tomorrow.

[tmerton]

For the Car and Driver crowd.  Pretty darn good.

[tmerton]

Best quotes from on-line readers to the Daily Planet's report on "Fall Dance":
"Lacrosse is for wanna-be hockey players who were too lazy or unskilled to learn to skate."

Or maybe they just live somewhere that their lakes don't freeze and ice is found only in their refrigerators.   

[DuffMan]

Or maybe they just live somewhere that their lakes don't freeze and ice is found only in their refrigerators.   

Is #2 son coming to MN to learn to skate?

Also, will the front of his helmet read "#2 Son" or will it have his name?

[tmerton]

Is #2 son coming to MN to learn to skate?

Also, will the front of his helmet read "#2 Son" or will it have his name?

Not sure about skating.  I have advised him to leave his snow board at home and to take up XC skiing. 

As for what's on the front of his helmet, I suppose that's up to Gags and the equipment manager.  BTW, when did this practice start?  The Johnnies appear to be the only ones who do it, yes?

[DuffMan]

John's been doing it for ages.  We're the only team that I've ever seen it from.  It helps him to learn all 190 names.