FB: Minnesota Intercollegiate Athletic Conference

[finsleft]

Nathan comes in to pitch in the 9th, gives up a single, then strikes out the side.
Twins win 6-4.
Rondell goes 0 for 4, keeping beer affordable at the 400 Bar.  8)

[SUMMIT!!!!!]

Was the the Dome today....some observations:

*Santana looked human, not close to his best sutff but best is not needed vs TB. He still was able to reach back and work out of jams

*Neshek is beyond wicked....The 3 D-Rays he faced all "Parnelled" (I think that's the term you coined KR). 15 pitches = 3 Ks, all swinging lamely, the kind of swing where the batter prays he might make contact.

*If any of you want to visit one of the ultimate baseball site, go to www.patneshek.com . Maintained by PN himself. the site is FULL of juicy tibdits. The guy may be in The Show, but his heart is still all fan...he even runs contests for fans to enter

* Back in early June, Morneau said: "As Cuddyer goes, so go the Twins."  He's not their MVP, but Cuddy inspires the rest to excel and time after time sparks the offense. Today was further validation of Morneau''s statement

* Nick Punto is a gritty hard-nosed ball player and a devilish basebrunner. His deke of Lugo in the 4th was sheer brillance.... absolutely classic!!!! He plays like he's still a kid in LIttle League--- full throttle all the time

* Morneua's glove is almsot as valuable as his bat. He has matured so much as a hitter in the past 12-15 months it is scary

* Redmond can flat-out hit....he's worth more than what the Twins paid Sierra, Castro & Batista combined

* Rumors abound that a "full figured matron" dozed off during the game sitting next to someone who looked frighteningly like TDT.... but the dude wasnt decked out in pink, so it must have been my beer playing tricks on my eyes

[tmerton]

Anyone see any rain in the midwest today?  Went to the SF airport today for the long planned summer vacation and wham - 3 hour flight delay into Chicago.  Immediately apparent we were going to miss the connecting flight from there (#1 son and my mother were going to meet us there to get on the same connecting flight but their flight into Chicago was delayed as well).  Ms. United's explanation - "weather" - which is airline lingo for we're not responsible and your'e on your own.  After several false starts and threats to call her supervisor, she finally became helpful (much to the dismary of the long line of other Chicago connectors behind us).  So several hours later we're back at home and going to try it again tomorrow morning.     This time everyone is connecting through Seattle instead of Chicago (yes, it's going in the wrong direction, but that's the way it goes).  

[Kilted Rat]

1st place, MR

Shields pondering:  "I wonder if anyone will notice that I shaved my pubes and put them on my chin?"

2nd place, Johnnie Esq

"Look maw, I can juggle my ball while wiggling my ears!  Ain't you proud of me?"

Tied for 3rd place due to obligatory positioning with use of testicular exam and hernia check jokes:
Fins

Turn your head and cough.

Chris 56317,

Hey Coach Butcher, if Kazmir won't help you with your exam, I'll do it!

tied for 4th/5th depending on your way of thinking place,

tmerton

My mother wanted me to play football so I'd have to wear a helmet but I think I'm pretty.

Poster formerly known as FPM

So what if Johan is a better pitcher I have better facial hair and bigger ears...  well I have bigger ears at least.

Whoa Nelly,

...and that's why I think David Spade should have won an Oscar for Joe Dirt.

End result due to a variety of well-qualified entries on a difficult picture, judges rule +k to everyone who submitted and anyone else who posted between last night and now... except for Raiderguy because he doesn't know that "by" [sic] as in purchase has a u in the middle.

[Kilted Rat]

UPDATE on KR's ability to curse MLB Players[/b][/u]



1.  7/16 posted above picture of Nick Punto captioned "Tyner on Deck, Punto in the hole" by Whoa Nelly.            7/17 Punto leaves the game early with an injury



2.  7/18 posted above picture of Scott Kazmir and his Batting coach Butcher saying: "Butcher:  "Dude, all I am asking is that you hold one of them and I turn my head and cough, what's so hard about that?"" by Mighty Royal
7/18 Kazmir, dubbed one of the best young guns in MLB gave up 7 hits and 4 ER over 6 innings en route to a Twins 8-1 win.



3.  7/19 posted above picture of Jae Seo upset because "What do you mean, nobody watched the World Baseball Classic?  It was great!" according to Johnnie Esq.
7/19 Seo gives up 7 ER in 5 2/3 innings on 11 hits with 1 walk and HE GAVE UP 2 Home Runs and a double to Rondell White!!! (3/3 against Seo on the day)


4. 7/19 posted above picture of James Shields pondering "I wonder if anyone will notice that I shaved my pubes and put them on my chin?" according to Mighty Royal
7/20 WITH KR in attendance, Sheilds gives up 8 hits and 5 Earned runs in 4.1 innings.



Sticking with the Pitchers theme here is a pic of tomorrows starter for Cleveland, C. C. Sabathia who will face off against Carlos "I hide immigrants in my cheeks Silva."


*note: someone else made this awesome picture all we must do is comment on it.

Keeping with the homo-erotic theme, here's an extra picture of CC for comment if you should prefer:



As an added bonus since Travis Hafner is having a helluva year and I wanna curse him for the whole series, here's today bonus picture for captioning:


Obviously bonus points will be rewarded for comparing CC Sabathia to a sloth, Bennie, or other large hairy slow moving creature, ditto any Vin Diesel references in the Hafner caption.


Please specify which image you are captioning when entering the contest. Thanks for playing and as always, have your dogs, cats and TDT's spayed or neutered.

[SUMMIT!!!!!]

[
Sticking with the Pitchers theme here is a pic of tomorrows starter for Cleveland, C. C. Sabathia who will face off against Carlos "I hide immigrants in my cheeks Silva."


*note: someone else made this awesome picture all we must do is comment on it.

"I ees on the CC Diet...I eats what I see, si"

Keeping with the homo-erotic theme, here's an extra picture of CC for comment if you should prefer:


Martinez: "CC, you is my man, even if that Bennie's backside is bigger than  yours"
CC replies "Vic, I wish I could be over you "

As an added bonus since Travis Hafner is having a helluva year and I wanna curse him for the whole series, here's today bonus picture for captioning:


Hafner, observing Martinez and CC:  "Dudes, that's a pitcher's mound, not Brokeback Mountain."

Obviously bonus points will be rewarded for comparing CC Sabathia to a sloth, Bennie, or other large hairy slow moving creature, ditto any Vin Diesel references in the Hafner caption.


Please specify which image you are captioning when entering the contest. Thanks for playing and as always, have your dogs, cats and TDT's spayed or neutered.

[Kilted Rat]

Was the the Dome today....some observations:

*Santana looked human, not close to his best sutff but best is not needed vs TB. He still was able to reach back and work out of jams Agreed, he made some bad pitches and got burned by them. Also, I didn't see a single pitch on radar of over 91 MPH. The bats won this game for him, much like they did in his last start... I really hope thats not the start of a trend for him.

*Neshek is beyond wicked....The 3 D-Rays he faced all "Parnelled" (I think that's the term you coined KR). 15 pitches = 3 Ks, all swinging lamely, the kind of swing where the batter prays he might make contact. Yeah, they all Parnelled their pants pretty good. Neshek looks like he brings the pitches from about knee level with his side-armed delivery style. The kid looks like he has incredible potential either as a set-up man or closer, not sure about starter.

*If any of you want to visit one of the ultimate baseball site, go to www.patneshek.com . Maintained by PN himself. the site is FULL of juicy tibdits. The guy may be in The Show, but his heart is still all fan...he even runs contests for fans to enter Agreed.

* Back in early June, Morneau said: "As Cuddyer goes, so go the Twins."  He's not their MVP, but Cuddy inspires the rest to excel and time after time sparks the offense. Today was further validation of Morneau''s statement Not so sure on that, Cuddy has been up and down throughout the past 2 months and the Twins seem to be doing fine despite his struggles. I will never forget the first time he pinch hit back in 2001 and jacked a Game winning walk-off dong in the Dome. I became a Cuddyer fan for life. "Michael Cuddyer Schuett" kind of has a ring to it, now all I have to do is convince Mrs KR of that... she already shot down Michael Jordan Schuett, Brett Favre Schuett, Hulk Hogan Schuett, John Gagliardi Schuett, and Pat Coleman Schuett

* Nick Punto is a gritty hard-nosed ball player and a devilish basebrunner. His deke of Lugo in the 4th was sheer brillance.... absolutely classic!!!! He plays like he's still a kid in LIttle League--- full throttle all the time If his knees are bothering him, he doesn't show it. I think he dove back to first every time there was a pickoff attempt, he flew around the bases like a man possesssed. Despite his lack of size, he doesn't seem to have any problem getting the ball from 3rd to 1st.

* Morneua's glove is almsot as valuable as his bat. He has matured so much as a hitter in the past 12-15 months it is scary The snag on a line drive Morneau made in the 1st followed by doubling the runner off 1st was a rocket. The sound of the ball hitting his glove was louder than any pitch I had ever heard.

* Redmond can flat-out hit....he's worth more than what the Twins paid Sierra, Castro & Batista combined He has an incredible ability to place the ball where the defense isn't. He doesn't hit it hard, he just makes solid contact. As scary as the thought of Mauer getting injuer is, I'm a lot more comfortable with Redmond as full-time than Henry Polanco or Lecroy.

* Rumors abound that a "full figured matron" dozed off during the game sitting next to someone who looked frighteningly like TDT.... but the dude wasnt decked out in pink, so it must have been my beer playing tricks on my eyes Did not see this however there was a guy who looked like a 350lb version of Hrbek.... ok he looked like Hrbek 20 feet away from me.

As previously mentioned in today's wrap-up of the KR Jinx marathon, I was at the game today sitting in the 10th row of the Home Run porch in the section closest to centerfield.


The reason I was there is part of my rationale as to why I have the greatest wife EVER!!! Last night about midnight when MrsKR and I were heading to bed, she asked what I had planned for today. I replied nothing much, just want to be near my computer at noon when the Twins play.
Her reply (the 2nd most beautiful words I have ever heard out of a woman's mouth) "Why don't you just drive up there and go to the game?"


As a 1 year veteran of the married ranks, I know suggestions like this are rare at best, so I jumped at the opportunity. Like a little kid, I was too damn excited to get to sleep until about 1:30AM which when combined with getting up at 6AM to workout (MrsKR's only stipulation on the deal) and driving 500 miles is why I am tired as hell right now.

I got to the Dome at about 11:40, bought my ticket, went inside bought a dome dog, covered said domedog with mustard, ketchup, sauerkraut, and onions, then stopped to fill in false info for a credit card application to get the free baby blue Twins T-shirt, got ketchup and mustard from the dome dog on the T-shirt, then I went in and found my seat.

There were 300+lb individuals on each side of my seat the 2nd row from the railing and I could smell them from the aisle, so I went up and had the entire 10th row to myself to eat my dome dog in peace.

My thoughts on the game are above with Maniac's in bold as well as below.

-Rondell White can move pretty well in Left. The funniest thing is when he's changing his allignment or whatever he doesn't walk or run, he skips even if it means skipping backwards. Funny as heck to watch, especially from about 30 yards away.
- Nathan's last 3 strikes to the last batter were insane. If the batter got within a foot of hitting any of them, I'd be surprised. Poor Gomes had already struck out 3 times on the day and Nathan made him look like an uncoordinated Little Leaguer.



After 500 miles of driving, 1 dome dog, 1 chipotle burrito, a bag of gummy worms, a diet rootbeer, and watching a great game all on 4 hours of sleep, it's bedtime for this rat. Tomorrow I'm heading back to MN for a weekend PHR with some roommates from college, so the Hafner Jinx will run until I return.

[frankrickard]

Denny Green told me these were good



Victor Martinez, I apologize to you if I don't seem real eager to jump into a forced awkward intimate situation that people like to call dating. I don't like the feeling. You're sitting there, you're wondering do I have food on my face, am I eating, am I talking too much, are they talking enough, am I interested I'm not really interested, should I play like I'm interested but I'm not that interested but I think you might be interested but do I want to be interested but now you're not interested? So all of the sudden I'm getting, I'm starting to get interested... And when am I supposed to kiss you? Do I have to wait for the door cause then it's awkward, it's like well goodnight. Do you do like that ass-out hug? Where you like, you hug each other like this and your ass sticks out cause you're trying not to get too close or do you just go right in and kiss them on the lips or don't kiss them at all? It's very difficult trying to read the situation. And all the while you're just really wondering are we gonna get hopped up enough to make some bad decisions? Perhaps play a little game called "just the tip". Just for a second, just to see how it feels. Or, ouch, ouch you're on my hair.

As an added bonus since Travis Hafner is having a helluva year and I wanna curse him for the whole series, here's today bonus picture for captioning:


I can't believe I bet on TDT scoring with that hot chick...not only did I have to shave my head to look like Vin Diesel, I also had to make out with that "hot" bennie in addition to drinking zima's until I puke.

[tmerton]

Since we had to come back home to restart our vacation (early flight to Seattle tomorrow), we're spending our time watching the 2003 Stagg Bowl.  Funniest thing, the Johnnies win every time we watch.   8)

You guys take care; I'll check in from the cruise ship if we ever get there and I can push one of the teenagers away from the computer long enough to post (except I can't remember my password!).   

[raiderguy]

KR

Caught the "typing error" too late to change it. Thanks for calling me on it. I certainly dew no the diffrance. The next tyme we sea each uther I wood like to buy ewe won of those beers if I halve the chance.

Anyway, are there any KR sightings scheduled in the Twin Cities?

[Buckman]

Victor - "Hey CC, I know we've been struggling a bit this year, and even though you are my boy, do we have to do this after every strike?"

[BDB]

KR, you are on a roll man! 7 in a row since the KR Jinx-a-Thon rolled into town! +1k.

After reading today's submissions so far, I concede defeat already. Especially frankrickards Denny Green bit. 

All of them are great. However, I may offer up a testicle entry a la fins for a third place tie position. 

[Whoa Nelly]

The Natural Laws of Golf

1. If you really want to get better at golf, go back and take it up at a much earlier age. 
2. The game of golf is 90% mental and 10% mental. 
3. Since bad shots come in groups of three, a fourth bad shot is actually the beginning of the next group of three. 
4. When you look up, causing an awful shot, you will always look down again at exactly the moment when you ought to start watching the ball if you ever want to see it again.
5. Any change works for a maximum of three holes - - or at a minimum of none. 
6. No matter how bad you are playing, it is always possible to play worse. 
7. Never try to keep more than 300 separate thoughts in your mind during your swing. 
8. When your shot has to carry over a water hazard, you can either hit one more club or two more balls. 
9. If you're afraid a full shot might reach the green while the foursome ahead of you is still putting out, you have two options: you can immediately shank a lay-up or you can wait until the green is clear and top a ball halfway there. 
10. The less skilled the player, the more likely he is to share his ideas about the golf swing. 
11. The inevitable result of any golf lesson is the instant elimination of the one critical unconscious motion that allowed you to compensate for all of your many other errors.  12. If it ain't broke, try changing your grip. 
13. Golfers who claim they don't cheat also lie. 
14. Everyone replaces his divot after a perfect approach shot. 
15. A golf match is a test of your skill against your opponent's luck. 
16. It's surprisingly easy to hole a 50-foot putt when you lie 8. 
17. Counting on your opponent to inform you when he breaks a rule is like expecting him to make fun of his own haircut. 
18. Nonchalant putts count the same as chalant putts. 
19. It's not a gimme if you're still away. 
20. The shortest distance between any two points on a golf course is a straight line that passes directly through the center of a very large tree. 
21. There are two kinds of bounces: unfair bounces and bounces just the way you meant to play it. 
22. You can hit a 2-acre fairway 10% of the time and a 2-inch branch 90% of the time.  23. Every time a golfer makes a birdie, he must subsequently make two triple bogeys to restore the fundamental equilibrium of the universe. 
24. If you want to hit a 7-iron as far as Tiger Woods does, simply try to lay up just short of a water hazard. 
25. To calculate the speed of a player's downswing, multiply the speed of his backswing by his handicap. Example: backswing 20 mph, handicap 15,downswing 300mph. 
26. There are two things you can learn by stopping your backswing at the top and checking the position of your hands: how many hands you have and which one is wearing the glove. 
27. Hazards attract; fairways repel. 
28. You can put "draw" on the ball, you can put "fade" on the ball, but no golfer can put "straight" on the ball. 
29. A ball you can see in the rough from 50 yards away is not yours. 
30. If there is a ball in the fringe and a ball in the bunker, your ball is in the bunker. 
31. If both balls are in the bunker, yours is in the footprint. 
32. Don't buy a putter until you've had a chance to throw it. 

Now, go out and enjoy a wonderful game!

[sumander]

BDB, The oil market going crazy again today?

[BDB]

BDB, The oil market going crazy again today?

This week has been weird. One day up, next day down. Some profit taking has been taking place creating some sellers in the market then contrasted by the obvious upward movement because of the mideast issues. It's a jittery marketplace.

Currently crude is up .53 at 74.80 and gas is up 2.5 cents.