FB: Minnesota Intercollegiate Athletic Conference

[cobbernation]

MR-What website do you get your CN facts frome?

[bennie]

MR-What website do you get your CN facts frome?

ihaveamancrushonchucknorris.com 

[Kilted Rat]

MR-What website do you get your CN facts frome?

ihaveamancrushonchucknorris.com 

Is this going to turn into the 2006 version of who wants to have Blake Elliott's baby?

[sjusection105]

MR-What website do you get your CN facts frome?

ihaveamancrushonchucknorris.com 

Is this going to turn into the 2006 version of who wants to have Blake Elliott's baby?

Ummmmm, doesn't that right privilege belong to TDT?
I mean, man...it is downright UNCOMFORTABLE his unnatural "admiration" for the 2003 Gagliardi Trophy Winner

[Touchdown Tommy]

ho ho ho isn't Mr. 105 quite the comedian tonite.

Re: Our favorite Beer Bottle Thrower

Yes that's right fellas.  Just got off the phone with Willy Wonka.  He was downright giddy with news for TDT.  He said that he just heard on the radio that there will be a cage fighting match at "The Myth" (i guess it is a MSP nightclub) featuring none other than Marcus Levesseur.  Oh how the mighty have fallen.  Four time state undefeated wrestling champ, full ride to the U of MN, to Auggie Tech, to the nightclub circuit where some club manager is prolly tossing him a Benjamin to either get the piss beat outta him or vice versa.  Too funny...

Godfather: We're gonna have a little chat at the next Stiftungsfestivities...

[sjusection105]

TDT, KR is my set up guy. You have to take the hanging curveball & hit it out of the park!

Are you going to be at the game this weekend or are you talking about the big game against Wonka's & Frank's squad on Oct. 14?

Is the "match" one of those Ultimate Fighting things? Those guys have a much different "agenda" in life than I do

[Kilted Rat]

What are your plans for Saturday?

[DuffMan]

Sorry, KR, I will be camping this weekend.

[ruggerrat]

Seems to me a little humor is needed at this point (TO is admittedly a joke but that's not the kind of humor I had in mind).

Here's an interesting story about a Texas Chili Contest that seem to involve someone we know.

For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know they actually have a Chili Cook-off about the time Halloween comes around.  It takes up a major portion of a parking lot at the San Antonio City Park.  Judge #3 was an inexperienced Chili taster who was visiting from Naples, FL.  He was assured by the other two judges (Native Texans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy and, besides, they told him he could have free beer or Zima during the tasting.

Here are the scorecard notes from the event.

CHILI # 1 - MIKE'S MANIAC MONSTER CHILI...

Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.

Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild.

Judge # 3  -- Holy ****, what the hell is this stuff? You could
remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the
flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These Texans are crazy.

CHILI # 2 - AUSTIN'S AFTERBURNER CHILI...

Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.

Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken
seriously.

Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what
I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who
wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer
when they saw the look on my face.

CHILI # 3 - FRED'S FAMOUS BURN DOWN THE BARN CHILI...

Judge # 1 -- Excellent firehouse chili. Great kick.

Judge # 2 -- A bit salty, good use of peppers.

Judge # 3 -- Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose feels
like I have been snorting Drano. Everyone knows the routine by now. Get
me more beer before I ignite. The barmaid pounded me on the back, now
my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting ****-faced
from all of the beer.

CHILI # 4 - BUBBA'S BLACK MAGIC...

Judge # 1 -- Black bean chili with almost no spice. Disappointing.

Judge # 2 -- Hint of lime in the black beans.  Good side dish for fish
or other mild foods, not much of a chili.

Judge # 3 -- I felt something scraping across my tongue, but was unable
to taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the
beermaid, was standing behind me with fresh refills. That 300-LB woman
is starting to look HOT...just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is
chili an aphrodisiac?

CHILI # 5 LISA'S LEGAL LIP REMOVER...

Judge # 1 -- Meaty, strong chili. Cayenne peppers freshly ground,
adding considerable kick. Very impressive.

Judge # 2 -- Chili using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must
admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.

Judge # 3 -- My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and
I can no longer focus my eyes. I farted and four people behind me
needed paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that
her chili had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from
bleeding by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if
I'm burning my lips off. 
It really pisses me off that the other judges asked me to stop
screaming.  

CHILI # 6 - VERA'S VERY VEGETARIAN VARIETY...

Judge # 1 -- Thin yet bold vegetarian variety chili. Good balance of
spices and peppers.

Judge # 2 -- The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions, and
garlic.  Superb.

Judge # 3 -- My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous,
sulfuric flames. I **** on myself when I farted and I'm worried it will
eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except
that Sally. I can't feel my lips anymore.  I need to wipe my ass with a
snow cone.

CHILI # 7 - SUSAN'S SCREAMING SENSATION CHILI...

Judge # 1 -- A mediocre chili with too much reliance on canned peppers.

Judge # 2 -- Ho hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of
chili peppers at the last moment. **I should take note that I am
worried about Judge # 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is
cursing uncontrollably.

Judge # 3 -- You could put a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin, and I
wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost sight in one eye, and the world sounds
like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with chili, which
slid unnoticed out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava to match my
shirt.  At least during the autopsy, they'll know what killed me. I've
decided to stop breathing it's too painful. Screw it; I'm not getting
any oxygen anyway.  If I need air, I'll just suck it in through the 4-inch
hole in my stomach.

CHILI # 8 - BIG TOM'S TOENAIL CURLING CHILI...

Judge # 1 -- The perfect ending, this is a nice blend chili. Not too
bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.

Judge # 2 -- This final entry is a good, balanced chili. Neither mild
nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge #3 farted,
passed out, fell over and pulled the chili pot down on top of himself.
Not sure if he's going to make it. poor feller, wonder how he'd have
reacted to really hot chili?

Judge # 3 - No Report

Great clues:special judge #3 is Touchdown Tommy. He not only likes Zima, but has been know to hit on large bar maids when drunk as well as "shart" himself.

Best check this against M.R..... Could be Chuck Norris doin his M.I.B. imitation???
No better disguise than actin like TDT, eh?

[SUMMIT!!!!!]

only in WI...http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/news/story?id=2604874

[Willy Wonka]

Man, this is sweet. My buddies and I actually did this same thing in our league two years ago...Bam Morris was the first overall pick, as we allowed former NFLers. Enjoy.

*********************************************************

"FINAL WORD
In last week's column, I wrote:

Yahoo! Sports Editor Brandon Funston recently sent some of us a list of the Yahoo! Fantasy Football "Percent Owned Numbers", i.e., a list of what percent of leagues particular players were rostered in. For example, it might not surprise you that there is no Yahoo! league where Torry Holt is available as a free agent... But as you go further down the list, there are some curious findings. Someone apparently owns Craphonso Thorpe, for example.

To which a reader responded:

I, drunkchicken, of Red Sox Nation, drafted and still maintain, Craphonso Thorpe on my roster. I feel your comments citing Craphonso specifically need some context. First of all, I was first introduced to Craphonso in November of 2003 on my virgin trip to Notre Dame's campus. Florida State ended up torching ND 37-0, led by Craphonso's 217 yards and 2 TDs. I mean this guy lit them up. Also, his name was Craphonso, which obviously includes the word crap, and that, to me, was really something. So last year, his first year drafted, I selected him as my last pick for my fantasy team. Figured I'd make it a tradition. Unforturnately, he was released before our draft. Thankfully, Yahoo! kept him on the roster because our fantasy league has a side arrest pool this year. The team that has a player actually arrested during the season wins the pot. I mean, a FSU alum, recently cut, time on his hands. It was a golden opportunity. Of course now it's been argued that the player has to be on an active NFL roster, so it seems I'm crap out of luck. Moving on. There's more to fantasy than just numbers (mainly arrest propensity). But seriously, who names their kid, Craphonso?"

***************************************************

As a sidenote, I love remembering games where Notre Dame gets pounded at home.

Also, I can verify TDT's story about the former Auggie QB. He's apparently fighting Thursday night (tonight) at The Myth around 7 p.m. What are the chances Ryan Coleman shows up to take pictures for a feature story? Sounds interesting.

[OzJohnnie]

Dang, seems like last year the posts were about football.  These last few pages have all been a bit personal.  Methinks folks may be spending too much time on these message boards.

Onto gridiron, will Crees do the job well this weekend.  I read in one of the articles that G jr said he does some things well and others not.  Anyone know his strengths?  What we are to expect this weekend?

[sjusection105]

Oz-

With a full week of practice I think Crees will be fine. No huge numbers & perhaps a little more of a running game than if Alex is playing. Something like 11 for 15 190 yds. 1 TD 1 int. is my guess. All 3 RBs getting carries (10 or more) my guess is with a tough Carleton D score is something like: SJU 21 Carleton 10.
This is my opinion & that is what this board is about

Others please share their thoughts about the SJU Homecoming game.

[DuffMan]

When I've seen Crees play, I have been impressed with him.  Now, I did not get to see him last week, but last year in the games that he got in, he did well.  He played extensively versus Northwestern, and we all know how tough KW is   He reminds me a bit of Ryan Keating--same number, same build.  I'm thinking with a week's practice at the helm, he'll be fine.  Sorry, though, can't really help you with his strengths and weaknesses.

[Kilted Rat]

What are the odds that Gag's (or Jimmy's for that manner) playcalling/ plays in the playbook have changed a whole heck of a lot since Ramler played?


With a backup QB in, I would imagine the play calling will come from the sidelines, how much does Ramler remember from the early 90's and would he use it?


All I remember from the early 90's are Sterling Sharpe, New Kids on the Block, my first pair of Zubaz, and acne.




Duff,
Since MrsKR will be in attendance and will be performing the ceremonial drive home, I will drink your share for you.