FB: Minnesota Intercollegiate Athletic Conference

[Rugman]

Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.
The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to apologize. 'Please allow me to help. I'm a Physical Therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow me,' she told him.

'Oh, no, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes,' the man replied. He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still clasping his hands together at his groin. At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help. She gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his pants and put her hands inside. She administered tender and artful massage for several long moments and asked,'How does that feel'?

He replied: 'It feels great, but I still think my thumb's broken.'

Great one Fins.  +k when my 24hr are up.  The wife doubled over laughing when I read her this one.

[finsleft]

New Govenor of New York and his wife admit to extra-marital affairs right after he is sworn in!

You can't make this stuff up. 

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/2008/03/17/2008-03-17_gov_paterson_admits_to_sex_with_other_wo.html

Several horrible thoughts came into my mind when I first heard this story today. Here they are in no particular order:

1. Did you notice he and his wife both admitted to having affairS? Not "I had an affair and she had an affair, they both admitted to affairS
2.  He's legally blind. Do you think he used the excuse "I thought it was my wife."
2a. "I don't see anything wrong with it." 
2b. "How am I supposed to know who it is I'm having sex with, I'm blind!"
3. Apparently affairs are ok, just so long as you don't pay for 'em!

My thoughts:

1. He was just going on a blind date.  8)

2. He thought it would be OK to truthfully answer "No" the the question, "Are you seeing someone else?"  8)

[BDB]

Being legally blind, it wouldn't have been worth it to him to spend $4500/hour. 

He's fessing up to a number of 'em now.

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/2008/03/19/2008-03-19_gov_paterson_admits_bedding_women_jealou.html

[bennie]

3. Apparently affairs are ok, just so long as you don't pay for 'em!

Of course he didn't pay for it, he too cheap! The Days Inn?? The amount that Spitzer payed for one hour would cover his hotel bill for a year (or more)! And the fact that he also took his wife to the same Days Inn...

[BDB]

3. Apparently affairs are ok, just so long as you don't pay for 'em!

Of course he didn't pay for it, he too cheap! The Days Inn?? The amount that Spitzer payed for one hour would cover his hotel bill for a year (or more)! And the fact that he also took his wife to the same Days Inn...

Agree bennie.

Must have racked up the frequent stay points with his girlfriends and then took his wife there with the free nights stay. 

[OleFan]

I would encourage you to look at the statistics posted on the board previously.  St. Olaf was not close to be the leading team in penalties.  Gustavus had the most penalties and averaged over 10 yards per penalty.  This is not to say that Olaf is not the cleanest team in the league, but I believe you could easily argue that they are not the dirtiest.  I respect your opinion on the play of St. Olaf, but many of the facts suggest otherwise.

[easy cheapshot]
I looked at those statistics, but I feared they may have been photoshopped...
[/easy cheapshot]

Very nice OzJohnnie.  I would +K a couple of times if I had the ability.

Olefan, You honestly expect to get an upgrade having sent a coach to the NFL?

I would like a coach that consistently makes the playoffs, and maybe this guy can do it.  I just desire a more proven record. 

I can confirm that he did interview for the job today.  St. Olaf is still interviewing candidates which surprises me.  This means that nobody has been offered a job.

Ole Fan, they might just decide to interview all the candidates before they hire someone.

They will interview all acceptable candidates before making the decision.  I am sick of the NFL and some college teams interviewing guys to follow rules or be PC even though they know who they are going to hire.

[OzJohnnie]

hey Oz just to let you know I am learning quite a bit about Aussie rules football from my mate from the land down under.  I can't remeber the name of the team he follows but I do know that they wear red and black.  I'll try to get the name of the team.  He tells me all the rest of the teams are s@#T. 

Trust a Bomber fan to call all the other teams sh*t.  To put it in perspective for you, that's like a NO Saints fan trying to convince a foreigner that the Saints dominate the NFL.  Delusional, that is.

Or better yet, an Arizona Cardinals fan trying to make the same argument.

[OzJohnnie]

3. Apparently affairs are ok, just so long as you don't pay for 'em!

Of course he didn't pay for it, he too cheap! The Days Inn?? The amount that Spitzer payed for one hour would cover his hotel bill for a year (or more)! And the fact that he also took his wife to the same Days Inn...

I figure that proves he must have paid for it, unless the other party was blind as well.  What self-respecting NY hussy would accept multiple repeat trips (remember, it was affairs, not flings) to a Days Inn when every second show about NY has the affair taking place on Park Avenue?

[bennie]

Does Days Inn have a complementary breakfast? Obviously Spitzer and him work off of totally different menus!  8)

[BDB]

Does Days Inn have a complementary breakfast? Obviously Spitzer and him work off of totally different menus!  8)

  VS 

Which one is legally blind? I forget. 

BDB'S LAST POST AS AN ALL REGION GUY!

[57Johnnie]

Does Days Inn have a complementary breakfast? Obviously Spitzer and him work off of totally different menus!  8)

  VS 

Which one is legally blind? I forget. 

BDB'S LAST POST AS AN ALL REGION GUY!

57s last +k to BDB as an All-Region 

[Knightstalker]

3. Apparently affairs are ok, just so long as you don't pay for 'em!

Of course he didn't pay for it, he too cheap! The Days Inn?? The amount that Spitzer payed for one hour would cover his hotel bill for a year (or more)! And the fact that he also took his wife to the same Days Inn...

I figure that proves he must have paid for it, unless the other party was blind as well.  What self-respecting NY hussy would accept multiple repeat trips (remember, it was affairs, not flings) to a Days Inn when every second show about NY has the affair taking place on Park Avenue?

No Days Inn on Park Ave, but a few blocks west on Broadway.

[finsleft]

BDB-
Welcome to All-American status! A place where we will toil for eons, or until Pat finally recognizes our true genius and elevates us.

[finsleft]

Three Things to Ponder:
1. Cows
2. The Constitution
3. The Ten Commandments


C O W S

Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give each of them a cow.


T H E  C O N S T I T U T I O N

They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq. Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years, and we're not using it anymore.

T H E  1 0  C O M M A N D M E N T S

The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this:

You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery," and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians...It creates a hostile work environment.


 

[BDB]

POST #2000!!!

All American status!  8)

For those of you that haven't read my first 1999 posts, let me assure you that you didn't miss much.

Here's a summary of what I've had to say:



+



+



I think that accurately summarizes my first 1999 posts.  8)