FB: Southern California Intercollegiate Athletic Conference

[snoop dawg]

low and uncalled for....deserves smiting.

[Sabretooth Tiger]

There was a competition which challenged the contestants to swim from Santa Monica to Catalina doing only the breaststroke, and the three women who entered the race comprised a brunette, a redhead and a blonde. After approximately 14 hours, the brunette staggered up on the shore and was declared the fastest breaststroker. About 40 minutes later, the Redhead crawled up on the shore and was awarded the second place prize. Nearly 4 hours after that, the blonde finally came ashore and promptly collapsed in front of the worried onlookers. When the reporters asked why it took her so much longer to complete the race, she replied, "I don't want to sound like I'm a sore loser, but I think those other two girls were using their arms."

[OXY Oswald]

A natural blonde got really tired of all the dumb blonde jokes, so she dyed her hair brown. Afterwards, she decided to go for a drive in the country. She came upon a field with a large flock of sheep. She stopped her car and approached the farmer who was tending the sheep.

"Oh! Those sheep are so adorable!" the blonde said. "If I can guess how many sheep you have, can I take one home?"

The farmer was a bit of a gambler, so he decided to let her have a try.

"OK, my guess is 157."

"That's amazing," said the farmer. "You're absolutely right."

The blonde picked out the one she wanted, but as she started to leave the farmer said, "If I can guess the real color of your hair, can I have my dog back?"

OxyBob

What do you call a blonde who dyes her hair brown?


Artificial Intelligence.

[EastCoastStag]

A plane is on its way to Detroit when a blonde woman in economy class gets up and moves into an open seat in the first class section.

The flight attendant watches her do this, and politely informs the woman that she must sit in economy class because that's the type of ticket she paid for.

The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here."

After repeated attempts and no success at convincing the woman to move, the flight attendant goes into the cockpit and informs the pilot and co-piolet that there's a blonde bimbo sitting in first class who refuses to go back to her proper seat. The co-pilot goes back to the woman and explains why she needs to move, but once again the woman replies by saying, "I'm blonde, I'm beatiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here."

The co-pilot returns to the cockpit and suggests that perhaps they should have the arrival gate call the police and have the woman arrested when they land. The pilot says, "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He goes back to the woman and whispers quietly in her ear, and she says, "Oh, I'm sorry," then quickly moves back to her seat in economy class.

The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to get her to move back to economy without causing any fuss.

"I told her first class isn't going to Detroit."

[scandihoovian]

Disclaimer: This is not quite up to par with some of the others (I hadn't heard ECS' before), but it was one of my uncle's favorites and I thought you'd get a kick out of it.

One day, three blondes were fishing in a stream. As they were fishing, a game warden came up to them and asked: "Do you have fishing licenses, ladies?"

One of the blondes replied "We don't have any."

"I'm sorry, but you need a license if you want to fish." replied the warden.

"But we're not fishing," replied the other blonde. "We have magnets attached to the end of our lines, and we are collecting debris off the bottom of the stream."

The warden lifted up all three of their lines and sure enough, there were three horseshoe magnets attached to each of their lines. "Alright, ladies, you can collect all the debris you want," said the warden.

After the warden left, all three blondes started laughing hysterically. "Stupid fishing cop!" said one of the blondes. "Doesn't he know there are Steelhead in this river??!"

[Sabretooth Tiger]

Two blondes were walking through the woods and they came to some tracks.

The first blond said "These look like deer tracks," and the other one said, "No, they look like moose tracks!"

They argued for quite a while, in fact, they were still arguing when the train hit them.

[EastCoastStag]

All these jokes makes me pray I don't have a blonde daughter!

[EastCoastStag]

That is an odd little bit of irony.

How does the song go? "It's a small world after all...."

[D O.C.]

Now...back to the babble

        <A young redhead goes into the doctor's office and says that
  her body hurts wherever she touches it.
     "Impossible," says the doctor. "Show me."
     She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony.
  She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams.
  Everywhere she touches makes her scream.
     The doctor says, "You're not really a redhead, are you?"
     "No," she says, "I'm actually a blonde."
     "I thought so," the doctor says. "Your finger is broken.">

[Klopenhiemer]

Snoop how about them Pens?

[snoop dawg]

Klop....how about that sweep?

[Klopenhiemer]

From The Dickinson Press, former Redlands head coach Ken Miller was named head coach of the CFL Saskatchewan Roughriders:

Miller's work pays off

Ken Miller doesn't have much alone time these days.

Last year, as the offensive coordinator of the Canadian Football League's Saskatchewan Roughriders, Miller would sit in his office for great portions of the day, working undisturbed on the team's playbooks and schemes.

That all changed on Feb. 6, when, at age 66, he was named the Roughriders' new head coach.
...

Miller has taken the long road to the top. He began his coaching career as a student assistant to Dickinson State coach Roger Huffman in 1966 after playing on the offensive line for the Savages in 1959, 1960 and 1965.

Since then, Miller has spent more than 40 years coaching football.

He began his career coaching at Oregon and California high schools before moving on to NCAA Division III University of Redlands outside of Los Angeles – where he spent 24 years, four of which he compiled a 10-29 record in his only other stint as a head coach.
...

At Redlands, Miller replaced the legendary Frank Serrao, who won 9 SCIAC championships, including 6 straight from 1973-1978. I'm sure Sabretooth Tiger remembers those UR teams. Under Miller's leadership from 1984-1987, Redlands was 5-5, 4-6, 0-10, and 1-8. Mike Maynard replaced Miller in 1988 and has been there ever since.

OK, Klopenheimer and Snoopy, you can continue now with your scintillating repartee.

OxyBob

OB another example of how you make me laugh out loud on many occasions.  Scintillating repartee...that killed me

[Knightstalker]

Some more Oxy recruit news, this time from the Long Beach Press-Telegram:

Prep Notes: Wilson celebrates 23 commitments

Wilson High took about an hour Monday to celebrate the accomplishments of 23 seniors who have signed national letters of intent and will continue their athletic careers at four-year colleges.
...

The football team honored two players, Randall Hooks and Ayrton Bates, although they didn't attend the ceremony. Both have signed with Occidental, "the Princeton of the West," according to Wilson football coach Mario Morales.

Also, Redlands landed some recruits, according to the San Diego Union-Tribune:

2008 High School College Commitments

Following is a list of San Diego Section high school students from the class of 2008 who will continue their athletic careers at the intercollegiate level.
...

Santana's Tyler Aubrey (Redlands–c) ... Rancho Bernardo's Nick Carmichael (Redlands–c) ... Santana's Kyle Romero (Redlands–c); Santana's Brett Romero (Redlands–c)...

Congratulations to Redlands, the Mercer County Community College of the West.

OK, Klopenheimer and Snoopy, you can continue now with your scintillating repartee.

OB another example of how you make me laugh out loud on many occasions.  Scintillating repartee...that killed me

Whew, and here I was afraid that you'd say that my comment was low, uncalled for, and deserved smiting.

OxyBob

I owe OB +K for the Mercer County College crack.  Dat wuz a gud von.

[EastCoastStag]

GAAAAAHHHHHH

You don't "sign" at the DIII level... when will papers and coaches and players stop saying this.

[Gray Fox]

From the IIAC board

.......back to IIAC football to stew the conversation:

I just looked at the Central football website and found that the Dutch have scheduled Lakeland and Albion for their non-conference games.  I am wondering why Central doesn't play some real competitors in those games.  Is it simply to stack up more wins against pansies?  Last year they had at least one real contest.  Now it seems the goal is simply to put two notches in the belt.

I realize Luther has scheduled Waldorf but they also have St. Olaf once again.  Both are natural selections given the backgrounds of the schools.

Come on Dutch.....schedule somebody. 

Old Norse,

Pat is dead center on.  After having games with Augustana, Bethel, and St Thomas the last three years, Hope was also there but that was a two year deal and they were a playoff contender.  Hope was not a real tough playoff team but they were a qualifier none the less.  Bethel would not renew, and St Thomas would not renew as well.  Augustana filled up so in a way they chose not to renew with Central as well.  I know that there was a scramble to get a tenth game for this fall.  Albion would not return the game in Pella so it is only a one year deal so there could be a tenth game.  I do know that Redlands was contacted to fill the tenth game but they could not return the game in Pella as well.  I also know that Mount Union was even contacted but when you only have one non conference game they fill up fast.  With the MIAC not wanting to schedule games it makes it a little more difficult to schedule.  Waldorf being a natural selection is a stretch IMHO.  They are not a d3 school and would give Luther no boost in a selection process for a playoff game what so ever.  So before you start casting stones maybe you should move out of the glass house you live in.  Walston brings up a good point as well.  With all the losses to graduation the Dutch have some holes to fill.  Why would you want to load up the non conference schedule as well as having to go through a usually demanding IIAC schedule too?  When Central was down from 4-5 years ago they did not have any trouble filling the nonconference games. 

As discussed in previous posts scheduling tough teams do no good for the upper level teams in the AQ conferences.  With needing a 9-1 record to get into the dance unless you win the conference why would you schedule a loss.  SJU, UWW, and the other conference leaders do not "load" up.  If you suffer a conference loss and then have a nonconference loss you are almost out of the playoffs.  I hope this helps anwwer your question. 

So Redlands would only play Central if Central would come out to Cali???  Do you know if that is what Dubuque is doing in their game at Redlands next year???  If Redlands is only willing to play Central or Dubuque at home are they at least sharing the travel costs???

I have no information on that.  I do not know the arrangements that were made.